Memories of Gurudev ❤️

While speaking to satsangis, Pujaniya Devi Ji recounts a wonderful interaction with Gurudev.

I will tell you the sweetest incident of my life. In those days, I was studying in Standard 10, and the Sadhana Shivir was being held at Mangarh. Sri Maharaj Ji’s orders for the Sadhana Shivir were, observe silence and do sadhana with roopdhyan. I am telling you about 1983 or 1984, and the sadhana of those times was very strict. Those days, Sri Maharaj Ji would punish anyone found talking—Get out of here! Do not show me your face, do not eat—such were the punishments. These days, of course, Sri Maharaj Ji does not even say anything.

So, there was kirtan in the hall, and I was doing roopdhyan. It was quite simple to do the roopdhyan of Sri Krishna, but the roopdhyan of Radharani was very difficult. Many people come to me with this problem—We can do roopdhyan of Sri Krishna, but we cannot do anything with Radharani. This was my problem, too. When she doesn’t even come, how can anyone meditate on her?

It is quite natural that it is not easy to meditate on Radharani, and whoever can do it will not meditate on anyone else!

The reason is, Radharani is the essence of Prem. She is Prem incarnate. The Prem that everyone is searching hither and thither since eternity, Radha is that Prem. The mahapurushas have attained that Prem and this treasure with them. With the power of this treasure, they can wrap Shyamsundar around their fingers.

Shyamsundar is enthralled with this Prem, and whoever has Prem, he will have Shyamsundar under his thumb. The endless running around that we have been doing since eternity it is to get this Prem. Or, to paraphrase it, to get Radharani. Radha is kripa incarnate, Prem incarnate.

I was crying and crying because I could not do roopdhyan of Radha. Along with that, I was imploring Sri Maharaj Ji for kripa that would enable me to do roopdhyan of Radharani.

Now, the question arises — In what relationship should I meditate on Radharani?

Even if it is possible to meditate on Radharani, on the crown on her head, on her nose-ring, on the anklets that adorn her feet, on the red scarf covering her head, but what should I consider Radharani as? What is the relationship? Should I regard her as the prime gopi of Sri Krishna? Or as the girl who is my friend? What should I consider her as? If we regard her as a friend, there is not that level of nearness, intimacy in it, even less if we regard her as Sri Krishna’s prime gopi. So, what is the relationship?

I could not come to any conclusion, and I was crying; I was in turmoil. I kept crying in this manner, unable to solve the question—What should I regard her as? In what bhava should I worship her?

Suddenly, on the second day, Sri Maharaj Ji arrived in the hall, looking every inch the authoritative guru. There was a microphone in the hall, and Sri Maharaj Ji grabbed it and said, ‘There are some sadhaks who are pondering over. With what attitude should I love Radha? With what relationship in mind should I worship Radha? I have come bearing a gift, a present, for such sadhaks.’ He had written a verse on a paper and declared, ‘I am opening a box, today I am giving the solution for those sadhaks who cannot do roopdhyan of Radharani. Regard her as your mother and worship her.’

The verse that Sri Maharaj Ji composed was, ‘O Maa Shyama teri jo charan sharan aye’.

In this composition, he pointed out to the jeevas; you cannot do roopdhyan of Radharani with any other attitude. Our natural disposition is eternal servitude; it is our nature to serve the supreme Brahm. We are parts of the supreme Brahm, aren’t we? So, what else is the nature of the part but to serve? It is a servant.

Thus, we should serve our queen, worship her by embracing her as our mother. If you too have the same problem, I am offering you the way out if you cannot do roopdhyan of Radharani. Know she is the epitome of mercy, grace, as the strength of the feeble, the redeemer of the fallen, think of all these gunas, know that she is your mother. She is the mother of the entire world. Sometimes, we see a father has become hard, but a mother

can never be cruel. Her nature is that of compassion. As for ourselves, we know that we jeevas are dirty, engrossed in worldly matters, that we commit sins without end. We are aware of our faults, but a mother can never be an evil mother. She knows us in and out and because she knows us, and she showers compassion on us. This is her nature. Radharani can do nothing but kripa; it fills every pore of her body.

Kripa ka hi tanu tora kripa karu Radhe

Her very body is made of kripa, not of flesh and bones. The body is kripa incarnate, the bearer of, and the very embodiment of Prem. So, accept that Radharani is your mother. Let me share with you something else, a weakness of Thakur Ji’s. If someone worships Radha, if he sings her praises and chants her name ‘Radha’, Thakur Ji’s weakness is, the moment the sadhak sings her name, Thakur Ji runs after him. The sadhak does not even have to chant the complete word ‘Radha’. Even if he has chanted only the first syllable ‘Ra’, Thakur Ji thinks, ‘Surely he is going to utter ‘Dha’ after this. I should follow him to hear it.’ It is entirely possible that person intended to utter ‘Ravan’ instead! But such is the interest, the eagerness in the supreme Brahm to hear the name of Radharani being chanted.

Think about it. How easily, how effortlessly we have received from our Gurudev the name of Radha, the very name that Brahm is so eager to hear. How effortlessly we can chant the name of Radha. It requires a lot of sadhana to chant the name of Radha.

Once I was travelling in a car with a sadhak whose wife used to come to my Satsang. The husband did not attend Satsang, but at his wife’s request, he was taking me from Raniganj to Katras. This sadhak is no longer with us now. On the way, he asked me, ‘Maa, I have no trouble in uttering Hari Om, but I cannot say Radhe Radhe. Please do

something so that I can say Radhe Radhe’. On hearing this, I jokingly said, ‘Love me, and only then you can utter it’.

He took this to heart and became attached to me. One day he rang up and said, ‘Maa, Radhe Radhe!’ On hearing this, I said, ‘How wonderful! Where did Radhe Radhe come from? And where did Hari Om vanish?’ He said Radhe Radhe so spontaneously.

That you can utter the name Radha, the entire credit for this, goes to your guru. The divine powers, in their entirety, rest on your lips when you chant this name. It is another matter that if you chant the name of Radha, and you have in mind a neighbour who also has that name, you will get nothing. But if you chant the name with sincerity, even before you utter the word Radha, Bhagwan will bless you with kripa.

So, realise the value of the priceless treasure that you have received. If someone worships Radha, he has automatically worshipped Krishna.

Krishna says I am bound to come to this sadhak because I have to hear Radha’s name. If someone loves only Krishna, for sure Krishna will come and give darshan. But he will then say, I am only half of the story. Now you have to worship Radharani. If someone does bhakti of only Radharani, he will automatically get Krishna. Worshipping Krishna alone is half the picture.

With this in mind, your Gurudev thought, ‘What is the point in worshipping Krishna first, and then worshipping Radharani later?’ He gave us the end product at the beginning because he is the avatar of kripa. When there is a kripa avatar, when Bhagwan himself comes as the guru, like, for example, Chaitanya Mahaprabhu, they do not consider whether or not someone is worthy. If they get stuck with checking who is worthy, they will only dispense justice, not kripa. The predominant factor in a kripa avatar is kripa; they shower their kripa even if the recipient has only a tiny drop of worthiness.

Thus, because of whatever little bhakti we did in our previous births, Gurudev gave us the fruits of that manifold. We had the good fortune of meeting the guru, and now we are chanting the name of Radha. Even the Vedas could not comprehend Radha; Brahm does not have that access. The Vedas cannot shed light on it.

We all are very fortunate; we have been born as humans, and we worship Radha. Meditate on Radharani by knowing she is your mother. Meditate in this fashion—She is in front of me, seated on her throne, and she has her hand of benevolence on my head and is embracing me. Sit at her feet and pray to her.

Sri Maharaj Ji has made it so easy for us; follow the verse and the line of the kirtan, and shape your bhava accordingly. Roopdhyan will happen on its own.

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